Doubt
by lookingforthestars
Summary: Paige and Walter reaffirm their feelings after struggling with uncertainty.


**This will definitely be AU by Monday, but who cares?**

"Hey."

Walter looked up from the suitcase on his bed, placing the gray shirt in his hand on top of his half-unpacked luggage. "Hey. Where's Ralph?"

"Downstairs. Knocked out." She was thrilled to see her son after their nightmare mission in Norway, but secretly grateful when he'd caught her up on his week and then nodded off. Even though the flight back to Los Angeles spanned more than ten hours, that last fifteen-minute drive to her apartment seemed impossible to face. "Is it okay if we just stay here tonight?"

The genius raised his eyebrows and Paige regretted asking. Walter valued his space, and they were hardly established enough for spending the night to be a foregone conclusion. Their single tryst, however explosive, wasn't an invitation to take up permanent residence in his loft.

"Uh, yeah. Of course," he said after a moment, flipping the front panel of his suitcase down and securing the zipper. He hadn't finished his unpacking, but he dragged the luggage off his bed and pushed it up against a wall. "Do you have something to wear?"

Paige nodded. Her own suitcase was still fully stocked, with at least one clean T-shirt and a gently-worn pair of pajama shorts. It was easier now to just maintain a kit of travel toiletries that stayed in her go bag at all times. _Never know when a frozen tundra could hold the key to saving humanity, right?_

"Okay. I'll, uh…" He pointed to the bathroom. "I'm going to take a shower, unless you want to go first."

"No. Go ahead."

"Okay." Walter lingered in his spot for a second, shooting her one last glance before he disappeared into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. The water turned on almost immediately and Paige flopped down on the edge of the bed, dropping her hands into her lap.

When she'd seduced the genius, standing in the middle of the loft clad in nothing but his shirt, she never imagined she could feel so awkward there. The way his eyes lit up had spiked her confidence and her libido. She wasn't thinking about anything besides fulfilling her heated fantasies about him. But they'd almost immediately crashed back to freezing reality. If it didn't sound so...illogical...Paige would have sworn that Collins knew something good had finally happened between her and Walter, and chose that exact moment to reveal the end of the world.

He'd gotten into her head again. She swore he wouldn't. She knew his tricks, she knew her place on the team, she was ready for him. And then she wasn't.

Of course Walter loved her. That wasn't something he would confess lightly. And even in the midst of their argument, her heart soared when he called her his girlfriend. Which was juvenile. What they had went far beyond that label. But she'd waited so long.

And she _had_ waited. Paige hadn't given herself to someone that way in years, physically or emotionally. Walter wasn't exactly the master of sweet nothings, but she'd found herself desperate to know what he was thinking. To know that they hadn't ruined everything by sleeping together. Wasn't that why they'd held back for three years? Because giving into their feelings would destroy their friendship, destroy Scorpion, destroy Ralph? What if that was still true, and they'd deluded themselves into thinking otherwise?

It took all of five seconds for Collins to sense her uncertainty and press on it like a wound.

What if a future with Walter was just a pipe dream? Wouldn't it be better to end it now before he got tired of trying and threw her away like everyone else?

"Paige?"

She jumped, startled out of her thoughts. It didn't seem like much time had passed, but Walter's hair was wet and he was wearing a fresh pair of sweatpants and a dark blue shirt. Either she had been zoned out for longer than she realized, or his efficiency was reaching new heights.

"Yeah. Let me get my stuff," Paige said, answering a question he didn't ask. She stood up, crossing over to her bag and sorting through the jumble of clothes inside. Another thought struck her—should she go in the bathroom to change? He had. Would he be uncomfortable if she stripped right there?

She shook her head. He'd already seen every inch of her, including her gooty, to adopt Toby's stupid but oddly catchy parlance. She had to stop this barrage of doubt, but it was somehow infecting her every thought. Collins had turned on a faucet she couldn't seem to turn off. Paige pulled her blouse over her head, reaching back to unfasten her bra and sliding it over her shoulders.

"You're stunning." She turned around slightly to see Walter sitting on the mattress, legs outstretched, watching her admiringly. He'd expressed that thought a few times in bed with her, although most of his appreciation was...non-verbal. But it still made her blush.

"Thanks." Paige shimmied out of her jeans and put on her pajamas, gathering her hair to pull it out of the back of her shirt. "And thanks for letting us stay tonight. I'll be in better shape to drive home tomorrow."

"You're, um…" She heard him pause, and swallow. "You and Ralph can stay here any time, you know."

Her hand stilled on her bag. There was so many nights that she'd dreaded leaving the garage. And now she could stay, they were dating, it made sense. Why was she so convinced that he was in a hurry to push her out?

 _History._

Walter cleared his throat, her silence not going unnoticed. "Please tell me what's bothering you."

Paige sighed. She didn't even know how to express the tangled fears and hopes in her brain. Maybe that wasn't so far off from what Walter experienced on a regular basis. "It's dumb."

"Even so, I'm not going to understand unless you explain it to me."

She couldn't exactly pretend nothing was wrong. And he deserved to know. Being together meant sharing the good and the bad, even if the bad set in sooner than she expected. Paige climbed back onto the bed, sitting against the headboard with her knees pulled up to her chest. "I don't want us to go extinct," she said finally.

Walter angled a little to look at her. "Neither do I."

"I know." She tilted her head back, gazing up at the ceiling. "But even when I was with someone I had a lot in common with, I've never been able to make it last. And you and me...Collins wasn't wrong. We're _so_ different. Nothing about this is logical."

He was silent, and just when Paige thought she might have really hurt him, the genius surprised her with a quiet laugh. "That's accurate." Walter reached over, sliding his hand over hers and linking their fingers. She let him, savoring the warmth of his skin. "Logic is important. It's the one thing I've always relied on when nothing else made sense to me. But it doesn't make me happy. You do." He halted, considering his next words. "Logically, we have always been different, but it's been an asset to our friendship and our work. Dating will change our dynamic, but it won't change the irrefutable fact that we are a good team."

Walter's confidence in the face of her own insecurity was a strange role reversal. But he was doing a surprisingly effective job of comforting her. "When I woke up here, after we…" She bit her lip. "This was such a big thing for me, Walter. I needed...I don't know. I needed to be sure that it meant the same to you. And then we got interrupted, and Collins was saying all this stuff and I handled it by distancing myself from you." Paige squeezed his hand lightly. "I'm sorry."

"I'm in no position to judge you for falling prey to Collins. And I'm sorry. I should have realized that you needed me to express myself more clearly."

"I probably could have done a better job telling you."

Walter offered her a crooked grin. "Open communication."

"Yes."

"In that spirit…" The genius drifted his thumb over the back of her hand, eliciting a subtle shiver from her. "I should tell you that was the best night of my life."

 _You don't have to say that._ But it wasn't a line. Paige could see it in his almost embarrassed smile, and heat rose in her cheeks. "It was one of the best for me, too."

The best night of her life was the first time she held Ralph in her arms. But she was sure that was one thing Walter could infer without her explicitly stating it.

"Are you tired?" He was still stroking her hand, and it wasn't difficult to read his mind. Paige answered by rolling to her side, tucking her legs under her, and pressing her lips to his. She hadn't stopped thinking about this since their first—and second—time, though combatting toxic gas had inevitably diverted her focus. But he was right. They specialized in the impossible. If he really believed they could make it work, then she could choose to have faith too.

Walter kissed her slowly, keeping his palm respectfully on her thigh. He seemed content to let her set the pace, at least until they got more acquainted this way, and Paige didn't mind. It was a huge leap for Walter to relinquish control with her, and after a decade of abstinence, she was still easing back into this herself. She smoothed her hands from his neck up into his hair, tilting her head to deepen the kiss. For a man who had limited experience, he was shockingly talented with his tongue. A small whimper came from her throat as his hand slipped upward, dipping under the leg of her shorts, and she broke apart to lay back against the mattress, tugging his shirt to pull him on top of her.

There was something satisfying about feeling his weight against her, something solid, something real. Walter dropped his lips to her neck, sucking lightly on her skin and drawing a moan out of her. Her entire body was on fire and he'd barely done anything yet. In the stretch after Drew left, Paige had been tempted to dull the pain with meaningless hook-ups, but she could never quite bring herself to go through with it. She didn't regret that. Nothing compared to being in love.

She inhaled sharply as his thumb brushed her nipple, and when he did it again she pushed at his chest to separate them. "Did I hurt you?" he asked, the concern in his expression only intensifying her desire.

"No. Shirt," she said, not interested in mincing words. The liaison wiggled out of her top, wondering why she'd even bothered putting it on in the first place. _Oh, right. Because you were being self-conscious and insecure._ Walter complied, reaching behind him to yank his shirt over his head. Paige pulled him back toward her as soon as he completed the task, amazed by how good his bare skin felt against hers. Judging by the way he shuddered, he'd come to the same conclusion. "I love you," she mumbled against his lips, still in disbelief that she could say it so openly now.

"I love you," Walter murmured, resting his hand on her abdomen and looking down at her. "Is this okay?"

Paige nodded, ready to lift her hips to remove her shorts but not getting the chance. She opened her mouth to tell him that he could take off the rest of her clothing, but he grazed her entrance and nothing came out except a shaky breath. Walter was supporting his weight on his other arm and Paige grabbed his bicep, needing some stability as he slipped two fingers inside her. She'd been tense that first night, but her muscles were considerably more relaxed now, and she was wet enough to make movement easy. "That feels so good," she whispered to encourage him, shutting her eyes so she could focus on the sensations.

He kissed her again, increasing his tempo as her body opened up to him. Her head and shoulders pressed back into the pillow while she rolled her hips, that pleasurable and unbearable tension building. Walter kept his lips on hers as her moans grew higher and longer, until she buried her head in his shoulder and came apart, shaking beneath him. He withdrew his fingers, wiping them on his pants and stroking her back to help her down.

Paige slowly returned to herself, flushed and out of breath. Losing control wasn't that easy for her, either, but Walter did his best to make her feel safe and secure, in this and every other way. She waited for her heart to stop pounding and then looped her thumbs around her waistband, removing her shorts and underwear in one move. Walter pushed up onto his knees so he could reach his side table, retrieving the box of condoms she'd bought earlier in the week. Even with her help, it took some finagling to free him from his sweats and Paige considered instituting a ban on pajamas for the foreseeable future.

"Do you need a minute?" he asked, holding the condom package in one hand and stroking her side with the other. There were still so many things they didn't know yet, what the other needed and wanted, but Paige looked forward to learning. She had a feeling they might even be surprised by what they learned about themselves.

"No. I'm good." He nodded, ripping the packet open and covering himself. He was fairly efficient for a man with limited sexual history, and Paige almost giggled imagining young Walter practicing on a banana in health class.

"What's funny?"

Apparently she hadn't done a great job of keeping the amusement off her face. "Nothing. Just...come here." Paige shuffled toward the center of the bed, pressing her feet into the mattress and kissing Walter long and deep as he positioned himself. He pushed into her slowly, stilling abruptly with rough breaths. "Are you okay?" she asked quietly, cradling his face and brushing her thumbs over his cheeks.

"Yeah." He exhaled, leaning into her touch and closing his eyes. "Yeah. A little...overwhelmed."

That was hardly surprising. She'd always craved and welcomed physical contact, but this level of it was unbelievably intense. It had to be compounded for him. "Can I do anything?"

"No. I just need to, uh, p-process."

"Okay." Paige was glad she'd already had her release, because she was barely restraining herself from moving. But this would pass, so she anchored her hips and focused instead on enjoying the feel of him inside her. There were times she had given up hope of experiencing this with him, but now that it happened, Paige chastised herself for not fighting harder. She didn't think she would ever be able to go back.

She reached up, running her hands up and down his chest soothingly. "I'm sorry," he murmured, looking away.

"Don't be. We can go as slow as you want." She _was_ starting to get a little agitated, but letting on would almost certainly ruin the night and ensure she would be taking care of herself in the shower. "Just breathe."

Walter nodded, bending down to capture her lips. She didn't know how long they stayed like that before he recovered and started to thrust, but she was sure he heard the sigh of relief that escaped her. Paige gripped his back, shocked by how quickly her muscles had started fluttering again. She kissed him until his faster pace made that difficult, and she bit her lip, intent on quieting her moan. She'd been a little louder during their first time, but if they wanted to be intimate on a regular basis, they would have to learn to hold back when they weren't entirely alone.

"Oh g-god," Walter stuttered, curling his hand into the sheet, and she realized that she'd been unconsciously tightening around him. "I'm close, Paige."

They lasted a little longer each time they did this, but both of them were so out of practice that it was amazing they'd gotten this far. The tingling and pulsing meant it wouldn't be much longer for her, either, and she gasped as Walter slid one hand down and tilted up her hips. He hit just the right spot two, three, four times and then he was pushing all the way, shuddering, dragging her under with him. Her second orgasm was even more powerful than the first and she dug her nails into his shoulders as her vision blurred.

As much as she wanted to hold Walter in the aftermath, it was a billion degrees in his loft and they reluctantly separated, laying side by side on the bed as they caught their breath. She was vaguely aware of Walter getting up to dispose of the condom and adjust the air conditioning, although she had no idea how he could walk when her legs still felt like gelatin.

"Where," she asked when he slid back in next to her, "did you learn to do that?"

The genius chuckled, leaning on his elbow and motioning to her. "Put your head up." He flipped her pillow to the opposite side and she dropped down, reveling in the coolness on her hot skin. He did the same for his pillow and separated the sheets so that only the lightest one was covering them. "I learned from you. The, uh, the first time, you kept lifting your hips so the obvious conclusion was that it felt good for you."

Paige rolled to her side, brushing her hair off her face. "You amaze me."

"I hope that's a compliment."

"Usually." The genius mirrored her position, placing one hand between them, and Paige slid her palm over it, locking their fingers together. "Walter?"

"Yeah."

"Did you…" _Stop hesitating. Be all in or be all out._ "Did you mean it when you said Ralph and I could stay here any time? Are you really okay with that?"

"Of course." Walter furrowed his eyebrows, appearing almost confused by the question. "I've always felt that way. Just...more so, now."

Paige pressed her lips together to quell her smile. "Good. Because I like being here."

Even before he spoke, the light in his eyes told her enough. "I like it too."


End file.
